In case you have been living in a cave, this happens to be Valentine's Day weekend, or perhaps, as it has come to be known this year, Fifty Shades of Grey opening weekend.

Begrudgingly or not, most of us have been subjected to every tidbit of news related to the much-anticipated onscreen adaptation of E.L. James' Twilight fan fiction turned erotica novel.

For those who have safely dodged every possible Grey reference and teaser that has been posted online, you still don't have to feel left out of the crowd. Some folks have been so generous enough to put together a handy infographic of every kiss, spank, bedroom scene and strategically censored genitalia in the movie.

According to the appropriately gray and red infographic, it comes as no surprise that female butts outnumber male back sides in screen time. Wouldn't you know it, male nipples were shown 21 times in comparison to a mere 14 times for female areolas.

Some have been criticizing the movie for being porn, but it may surprise you to know that, although the entire movie runs for 118 minutes, sex scenes only account for 19 minutes and 31 seconds of the film -- and you'd actually have to wait 42 minutes into the movie before any sexytime even begins.

Ladies, you'd have to wait one hour and five minutes before you even get a chance to possibly see Grey's much-written about "well-endowed manhood." Sadly, you don't actually get to see the full Grey.

Love it or hate it, Fifty Shades of Grey (and its recently announced movie sequels) was bound to be a blockbuster hit. The novel sold 100 million copies worldwide and, during this opening weekend, the movie has already brought in $93 million and counting.

Well, you still have time to see the flick this weekend for a Valentine's treat. It may even interest you to know that reportedly 87 percent of husbands claimed better sex lives with their wives after reading the novel.

ⓒ 2024 TECHTIMES.com All rights reserved. Do not reproduce without permission.
Join the Discussion